07/04/2006

Basic physics, for your inner hamster, inside of yourself.

On discussing nothing with lazydaisy, not your regular 6 pack kind of nothing important (talking crap) but the very real and tangible or at least the lack there of, of nothing, emptiness, the void that fills space when there is nothing there…. Hmmm. It seems that it is hard to imagine a complete void, one that does not even have any air. To eplain this we need to look at atoms, well they are very small so we can’t see them, when they are bundled together in varying densities we get the different phases of matter. These phases are, drum roll please, No that’s not the phase its just a phrase to introduce thing dimwit. The densest phase is a “solid”, where the atoms are so closely packed that they vibrate in extremely close proximity, so close in fact that they create a physical shape, which is more often than not rigid and hard (try walking into a wall, which is pretty solid and will probably hurt, a lot.) Common solids include ice, cheese, walls, tyre irons, nun-chucks, dog food pellets, kryptonite and fruit flavoured sweeties. The next phase is the liquid phase, this is where atoms are still quite close, but they do not form a rigid thing a ma bob. Due to their nature, liquids allow solids to move into and through them (a sword passes freely through beer), they mix with other liquids (rum and coke), and they can dissolve both gasses and solids (carbonated drinks have CO2 gas dissolved in it, and salt water has, well salt dissolved in it.) Common liquids include, beer, soy sauce, wine, tequila, punch, bloody mary, vodka, red bull, that funny blue shit in the bottle, beer and beer (apparently water is one too, I still need to investigate this though.) The last phase of matter is gas. That is when atoms are very sparse, so sparse that one does not realise that they are there, which comes back to the very small nature of the atoms. Gasses fill all the voids (empty spaces) between the other phases of matter (liquids and solids.) The room you are sitting in is filled with a combination of gasses we call air, which is also called the atmosphere, it is mainly made of nitrogen, and has oxygen O2 (used during metabolism – this is fairly important as it gives us the energy need to stay alive), and carbon dioxide CO2, remember the carbonated drinks (which is a by-product of metabolism – and is actually poisonous to us, its cousin carbon monoxide CO is much more dangerous – it comes from the rear of cars.) Common gasses are, chlorine gas, mustard gas, methane, air and fart gas (from your rear after you eat beens or cabbage).

What dictates the phase of any matter is its temperature. High temperature increases the movement between atoms, and hence there space between them. I.E. Ice (can be found in your neighbours freezer) melts into water when it is at room temperature (solid to liquid) put the water (sorry, I should have told you to put the ice in a glass, okay clean up the spilled water and get some more ice.) Note how the shape of the ice changes to fit the shape of the glass, now you can do the next step in a few ways. Basically you need to heat the water to about 100ÂșC. I tried setting it on fire but it seems to be a fire retardant – quite unlike petrol and other solvents, apart from water based ones of course. You can raise the waters temperature in the microwave or kettle, (be careful with the microwave as it will form hyper hot water, which is not moving, when you move it, the water will instantaneously change its phase from liquid to gas, this will spray fuggin hot water and steam onto you and those dum enough to stand near you while you play with the microwave. The kettle is safer; the bubbles given off during boiling are merely the bubbles of steam (waters gas state), which occur from the phase change (liquid to gas.)

Sorry I got a bit carried away, well explaining nothingness, like that in outer space. There is a finite amount of matter in the universe, that is if I keep on sending it through the SA post it will all eventually disappear (I think they send it to other dimensions.) And all of this finite matter needs to fill the infinite expanses of space. Doo dee doo dee doo…. Bum bum bummmmmm. Big revelation there are places without matter in them, these are called vacuums (no perfect vacuum exists, all those annoying little particles keep screwing things up.)

Whoa that was a long post, and I didn’t even get to explain that much. If this helped you please leave a comment, and I will further unravel the mysteries of the universe, or if you think this sucked leave a comment and then I’ll tell you why you suck. There is more on this subject, but I’m not gonna waste my time if you don’t want to read it. Thank you and good Friday afternoon.

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